With tongue in cheek, here is the real meaning behind job description wording:
"COMPETITIVE SALARY"
We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors.
"JOIN OUR FAST-PACED COMPANY"
We have no time to train you.
"CASUAL WORK ATMOSPHERE"
We don't pay enough to expect that you'll dress up.
"MUST BE DEADLINE-ORIENTED"
You'll be six months behind schedule on your first day.
"SOME OVERTIME REQUIRED"
Some time each night and some time each weekend.
"DUTIES WILL VARY"
Anyone in the office can boss you around.
"MUST HAVE AN EYE FOR DETAIL"
We have no quality control.
"SEEKING CANDIDATES WITH A WIDE VARIETY OF EXPERIENCE"
You'll need it to replace three people who just left.
"PROBLEM-SOLVING SKILLS A MUST"
You're walking into a company in perpetual chaos.
"REQUIRES TEAM LEADERSHIP SKILLS"
You'll have the responsibilities of a manager, without the pay or respect.
"GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS"
Management communicates, you listen, figure out what they want and do it.
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terça-feira, 6 de julho de 2010
quarta-feira, 31 de março de 2010
WHY A STUDENT FAILS ???
It's not the fault of the student if he fails, because the year has ONLY 365' days.
Typical academic year for a student.
1. Sundays-52,Sundays in a year, you know Sundays are for rest.Days left 313.
2. Summer holidays-50 where weather is very hot and difficult to study.Days left 263.
3. 8 hours daily sleep-means 130 days.Days left 141.
4. 1 hour for daily playing-(good for health) means 15 days.Days left 126.
5. 2 hours daily for food & other delicacies(chew properly & eat)-means 30days.Days left 96.
6. 1 hour for talking (man is a social animal)-means 15 days !Days left 81.
7. Exam days per year atleast 35 days.Days left 46.
8. Quarterly, Half yearly and festival (holidays)-40 days.Balance 6 days.
9. For sickness atleast 3 days.Remaining days 3.
10. Movies and functions atleast 2 days.1 day left.
11. That 1 day is your birthday. "How can you study on that day?" Balance days 0
"How can a student PASS?
Typical academic year for a student.
1. Sundays-52,Sundays in a year, you know Sundays are for rest.Days left 313.
2. Summer holidays-50 where weather is very hot and difficult to study.Days left 263.
3. 8 hours daily sleep-means 130 days.Days left 141.
4. 1 hour for daily playing-(good for health) means 15 days.Days left 126.
5. 2 hours daily for food & other delicacies(chew properly & eat)-means 30days.Days left 96.
6. 1 hour for talking (man is a social animal)-means 15 days !Days left 81.
7. Exam days per year atleast 35 days.Days left 46.
8. Quarterly, Half yearly and festival (holidays)-40 days.Balance 6 days.
9. For sickness atleast 3 days.Remaining days 3.
10. Movies and functions atleast 2 days.1 day left.
11. That 1 day is your birthday. "How can you study on that day?" Balance days 0
"How can a student PASS?
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